Peanuts and a Punk Rock Song

Peanuts are destroying society as we know it. I know what youre thinking my little Sith warriors, peanuts cant do anything, whys he talking about peanuts? Well my friends I shall tell you. It began a long time ag....nevermind it happened a month ago last tuesday.
I was lying on the floor trying to yell at the Mole People to stop thier attacks on North Korea when all of a sudden, I died. Thats right. I, The Pretty One, died on that day. How? I dont know. Perhaps I shouldve not pounded the ground near that antique Zulu spear I have hanging precariously above me. But hindsight is 20/20. Now then, what was i going on about? Oh yeah I dead.
I felt myself floating above my skewerd body and drifting up towards heaven. Then i stopped, hovered for a moment and plumetted like a Vanilla Ice record. Through the ground I fell, continuing down past the mole people until I reached Heck. Not hell, heck. It's like hell but less hot and evil. More like spending a day in New Jersey. Anywho, as I sat there trying to get my bearings who should walk up to me but, Chris Farley.
I know. I was amazed too. What was a comedian who died of an O.D doing in heck? Immediatly Mr. Farley went into one of his classic freak out bits. Physical humour plus his incredbly nimbleness that had captured audiences for over ten years on SNL. But quickly I grew bored and edged my way towards a lage door marked private. Of course I went in. Its the little rebel in me.
Inside at a large and forboding desk sat the most hideous and derranged creature I had ever laid my beautiful eyes on. It was Yasser Arafat. Strange as it was he looked almost human. He asked me what I was doing in Heck. I said I came to discover what I was doing there myself. So we chatted for a while over Mountain Dew and Krispy Cremes. Finally, after a lot of laughs, tears and opening on our love of all things punk, he decided to share with me the secret of why our society is so very wrong.
He looked aaround to make sure no one was looking then placed a CD in the player which sat beside him. It blared out Bad Religions 'Punk Rock Song'. THe reason for societies decline, he said, was peanuts. Now he didnt have time to eleaborate before a large demon wearing a Maroon 5 t-shirt(I guess demonic minions like that music)came in and dragged me away. Not saying a word he hurled me back up through a large hole. I went soaring through the earth until I reached my body.
So thats my story as you see. Learned my lesson and so did she. Well, actually no. niether I nor her learned our lessons. The point you ask? I dont know. Yasser (or Y-Dog as he's known to friends) didnt get to explain to me why peanuts are ruining our society. So....work it out on your own. Go out and dance around a maypole this day. I must go back at yelling at the Mole people so I can stop WW3 or the next Maroon 5 tour.
Adieu.
My tongue has gone astray.