Gas and Girlfixer (The Distillers)

Gas is falling. Now after months of more then a dollar a litre for gas (or whatever you Americans have with your non-metric system) it seems that prices are falling faster then last years iPod. Now I'm not saying it'll go down to 30 cents. But I have contacts within the gas companies that tell me the reason for the fall in pricing. It cost 5 people thier lives and 10,000 jobs but by the great rain serpent in the sky, I will bring the news to the lumping proletariat.
It today society oil is the lifeblood of the world. Oil keeps the cars moving, keeps the electricty juicing and keeps small sea creatures dying. But it seems that as a fossil fuel that its time on our little rock from the sun is limited, much like Maroon 5's career. Now, I'm no geologist or economics expert but I did walk onto an all womens college in Pennsylvania once. What I learned, beside the fact that mace hurts, is that we're searching for an alternative fuel source simply because oil is sooooo last century. Thier thinking now electricity will keep our small 4-door sedans moving.
Little do the gigantic gas and oil companies know but theirs a massive almost limitless supply of oil almost right where there sitting. Where is this magical and probably fake oil? Its in Mar Del Plata, Argintina. I know, I was surprised to. But thats what my contacts told me. See how far a stick of gum and $3 candian can get you?
I went to Mar Del Plata to follow up on this rumour. To my knowledge it was nothing but a relaxing resort town. But there was some meeting going on. They kept screaming about Bush. Now, I know the mid-90s Austrailian alternative-rock group was only so-so but really was rioting the answer? So avoiding the bricks, maltov cocktails, bits of lumber and tear gas I made my way through til I found the place. Let me tell you, those Americas Summit Meeting guards sure are rough. So what if I started digging right between the Presidents of Venezuala and Brazil? They didn't seem to notice too much. They were trying to stop Bush. Maybe the group was reforming and coming to thier respected countries, I don't know. 5 musketeers indeed.
In the end I sold my kidney to get back home. It was an unsuccessful trip all round. My contacts lied, I disrupted a trade meeting and I never found the massive hidden cache of oil. But I did come back with some cool scars. So, to you my friends I say this. Oil may not be around forever, but it will be around long enough to find us some better fuels. Why don't we go back to horses? Fast, reliable and if it comes down to it you can make glue outta them!
Adieu.
My kidney is lonely.